Voice of Kindness

Forgiveness of self through others.

I wonder what is happening to me that I am not freaking out over money as I have lifelong. I see the bills: root canal - $650; body shop for the car - $500; rental car - $500 (so far); tattoo - $500 (fighting the feeling of wasting cash); roof - $16,000 (will need to set aside $1,000/month to pay for it). I am uncomfortable with the numbers, but not entirely stressed as I normally would be. I have no money for my son’s wedding, but somehow feel that it will all work out.

I was on the phone yesterday with my father for whom I hold much anger. I was able to convey kindness and compassion to and for him. Will I eventually achieve forgiveness? Am I on that path? The secret I have discovered is that if I want kindness and forgiveness to be a part of my life then I need to give it out to those I meet. My anger grows when I do not accept people for who they are and I use anger to attempt to change them. My process is to hope others will want to avoid anger so change their behavior to avoid mine. The result of that faulty thinking is that people will eventually avoid me.

I treat others as I treat myself, but I use their behavior to justify my actions. What if I focus on kindness and compassion as my default? Maybe when life is hard as with many bills that are unpredictable I can show myself compassion instead of talking negatively in my head about what a failure I am for not seeing into the future or having a plan. Sometimes life happens and it is OK to first breath my way to being calm.

Ask Yourself…

How are you treating yourself when life becomes a struggle? In what ways

do you incorporate a gentle kindness toward yourself? (If you do not - in what ways do you plan to?)

With Gratitude,

The Professor